Iceland recently took the right to decide someones gender identity out of the hands of the medical gate-keepers and gave it to the people. Previously trans people had to live for a year live under the “correct gender role”. Needless to say, what was considered the “correct gender role” was often defined by gender stereotypes.
Trans people can now change their name and gender via a statutory declaration. They have also increased access to relevant healthcare.
Owl writes:
While in Britain so often trans rights are considered in opposition to women’s rights, in Iceland the two are seen not just as compatible, but complementary. These movements aren’t disconnected. On the contrary, the reason the wider LGBT movement in Iceland has been so successful is thanks to the feminist movement, which has inspired and fought alongside them.
Þorbjörg Þorvaldsdóttir (photo by Kristjana B. Guðbrandsdóttir), the chair of Samtökin ’78 – the national LGBTI organisation of Iceland – reflected on just how important this legislation was from a feminist perspective.
“This is obviously a great step forward for LGBTQ+ rights, but the new law is also an important feminist milestone. Transphobia – as well as prejudice against LGBTQ+ people in general – is deeply rooted in outdated gender norms and misogyny. The passing of this legislation sends an affirmative message to society that every individual should be able to define and live their gender as they please without prejudice. I believe that this will benefit everyone, cis people and trans people alike.”
Are cis women responsible for the murders of transgender women?
Men kill transgender women for several reasons, the main ones being internalized homophobia and transphobia.
The fear of feminization
Their friends, family, peers and role models have told them that (1) real men do not get turned on by men and (2) that trans women are men.
Neither is true. Trans women are not men, and the men who love them are not gay. But if they have, directly or indirectly, been taught this in conversations, through thousands of evil “jokes” and from what they see in the media, many will start to believe it.
And even if these men do not believe it, they may believe that others think so. They will fear that those bigots will ruin their lives if they are seen with a transgender woman. They are afraid of the social exclusion that follows from being seen as “abnormal” or “perverted”, and they direct their shame and anger towards the weak party: the transgender woman.
Misogyny is underpinning this bigotry: Women are seen as inferior to men, so any behavior that might indicate that a man has some kind of “female preferences” is taboo.
Needless to say, this fear also reflects negatively on the trans women. If the men who love them are seen as deviants, trans women are too.
The language of culture creates transphobia
This is the vicious circle of transphobia, the toxic feedback loop that drives the violence against trans women. The aggression follows from these men being unable to reconcile their feelings with the narrow gender norms of their community.
Some cisgender women preach a gospel that feeds this narrative. This applies, for instance, to reactionary right wing fundamentalists who cannot stand any kind of deviation from traditional gender roles.
These women are also victims of the Patriarchy. Repressive systems work best if they can harness the power of those who are oppressed.These women are responsible for what they are doing, all the same.
TERFs
The same applies to the so-called trans-exclusionary “radical feminists” (TERFs) who are systematically spreading the poison of transphobia in our society. I would say that what they are doing is in many ways much worse than what the rightwing Aunt Lydias do.
The Aunt Lydias of the world take part in the oppression of women. (From The Handmaid’s Tale)
Feminists are supposed to be trained in deconstructing the oppressive mentalities of the Patriarchy, but these so-called “gender critical” activists are actually adopting the tactics and the narratives of that system. They are using the same kind of arguments that have previously been used to invalidate gay and lesbian people, independent women and people of color against trans people. They are even collaborating with right wing extremists.
I also see them use pseudo-scientific theories of the sexist, Patriarchal, kind, to help parents invalidate and harass their own transgender children, forcing these kids to live up to the restrictive gender binary. The idea is clearly to breed new generations of people who can serve and uphold this oppressive system.
This is why it is fair to say that some women must share the blame for the violence against transgender women. They contribute to the development of a culture that encourages this kind of behavior. By saying that trans women are men they pour gasoline on the fires of homophobia and transphobia.
A killer is a killer
But let me make one thing perfectly clear: I do not belong to those that think that the existence of an oppressive social system can be used to excuse criminals for criminal behavior. The men who kill trans women are definitely responsible for the suffering they have caused, and I mean this both in a legal and moral sense. They have to be brought to justice and punished for what they have done.
What I am saying is that if we want to stop the persecution of trans people (and women, people of color and LGBTQA people in general) we need to understand the way people of ill will build a culture that makes this kind of violence possible.
What is great about this essay, is that Dan does not hide how hard it can be to be human, whether it is cis or trans. When relationships break up, they may sometimes be unavoidable, and both parties are part of what makes it happen.
Seeing the man who used to be my wife reminded me of the feelings of loss I felt in the months following his quiet and dignified disclosure to me of his transition…
We had been together from our late teens to early 30s. My understanding of our divorce was that we started too young, and the differences that seemed small at the time widened, as our childhoods ended and our adulthoods began. Only one of us wanted children, but that seemed abstract at age 20, hardly worth mentioning. By 29, though, its importance was real and plain. We were terrible with money, led by my stubborn refusal to balance a checkbook. I struggled with depression and anxiety. Some days I stayed in bed. I fell to pieces at the slightest criticism. I try to be kind to myself these days. But the truth is, I was not easy to live with.
It would be too easy to say now that I always knew something was going on with my spouse, something deep and important and hidden, but I didn’t. We started fighting, and the fights — loud quarrels, really — became bolder and more frequent. Our relationship frayed…
It may be called an “amicable divorce,” but the death of my marriage felt like any other death, hollow and dark and eternal. I felt the pain physically in my chest and face for weeks.
Meeting his ex wife again, howevver, becomes a confirmation of life for Dan:
His hug felt surprisingly familiar. This was the first good thing that happened at our reunion.
“Sharing a cup of coffee is what finally shook me from my grief,” he concludes.
Dan Higgins is Assistant Professor of Journalism and Communication at Canisius College.
McKrae Game founded the Hope for Wholeness Network, a Christian faith-based conversion therapy program that seeks to rid people of their LGBTQ identities.
Conversion therapy is based on the misconception that being gay, bisexual or trans is some kind of mental disease that can be cured, or a willed sin that can be repented. The fact is that you do not chose your sexual orientation or your gender identity.
I know that creating the organization that still lives was in a large way causing harm. Creating a catchy slogan that put out a very misleading idea of “Freedom from homosexuality through Jesus Christ” was definitely harmful.
Promoting the triadic model that blamed parents and conversion or prayer therapy, that made many people believe that their orientation was wrong, bad, sinful, evil, and worse that they could change was absolutely harmful.
People reported to attempt suicide because of me and these teachings and ideals. I told people they were going to Hell if they didn’t stop, and these were professing Christians! This was probably my worse wrongful act.
At one time I was working with so many youth that I had a weekly youth group, where they’d share why they were there, and I would guide them in how to not be gay. What a sad commentary of my past verses today, or a bad joke as many may see it.
Over at Medscape Dr. Will Boggs MD argues that also transgender men may need contraception counseling:
Transgender men and gender-nonbinary persons assigned a female gender at birth who are taking testosterone can still have unintended pregnancies, and both patients and clinicians lack knowledge about the need for contraception among transmasculine persons taking testosterone.
Testosterone therapy does not completely prevent ovulation, and there is little research that documents its full effect on fertility.
Doctor Boggs article is based on research done by Chance Krempasky, Miles Harris, Lauren Abern, Frances Grimstad, as presented in their recent paper: Contraception across the transmasculine spectrum.
TERFs and other transphobic activists are trying to create a narrative of transgender people (and trans women in particular) being violent sexual predators. This narrative has no factual basis, but historically this has been an effective way of harassing marginalized people (like, for instance, people of color, gay men and lesbian women).
But how do the organizations that try to stop sexual violence look at transgender men and women?
In the US many of them are members of the The National Task Force to End Sexual and Domestic Violence, and the NTF is very clear:
We, the undersigned sexual assault and domestic violence organizations, oppose antitransgender initiatives. These initiatives utilize and perpetuate the myth that protecting transgender people’s access to restrooms and locker rooms endangers the safety or privacy of others. As organizations that care about reducing assault and violence, we favor laws and policies that protect transgender people from discrimination, including in accessing facilities that match the gender they live every day.
States across the country have introduced harmful legislation or initiatives that seek to repeal non-discrimination protections or restrict transgender people’s access to genderspecific facilities like restrooms. Those who are pushing these proposals have claimed that these proposals are necessary for public safety and to prevent sexual violence against women and children. As rape crisis centers, shelters, and other service providers who work each and every day to meet the needs of all survivors and reduce sexual assault and domestic violence throughout society, we speak from experience and expertise when we state that these claims are false…
Nondiscrimination laws do not allow men to go into women’s restrooms—period….
Transgender people already experience unconscionably high rates of sexual assault—and forcing them out of facilities consistent with the gender they live every day makes them vulnerable to assault. As advocates committed to ending sexual assault and domestic violence of every kind, we will never support any law or policy that could put anyone at greater risk for assault or harassment.
These glorious people of all ages and colors from all over the US have only one thing in common: They do not identify as straight.
Thes photos are among more than 9 000 documenting the variety, beauty and truth of queer people: Photographer iO Tillett Wright has travelled to every one of the 50 states as part of the project Self Evident Truths.
Metro tells the story about Alex Tilinca, 18, a trans man who faced despair in 2016, after developing an eating disorder:
But the Long Islander turned his life around and competed against cisgender bodybuilders at the Victor Martinez’s Legends Bodybuilding Competition in New York on August 24.
After clinching first place in ‘Teen Classic Physique’ and second place in ‘Novice Classic Physique’ and ‘Junior Classic Physique’, he wants to use his success to show the world that trans people ‘are not victims’ and can do anything they set their minds to.
Trans people are more likely to develop eating disorders than cis people, mainly because their body is already our of alignment with their sense of self.
At the Kottankulangara Devi Temple in Kollam in India, there is a special festival where cis men and male to female transgender and nonbinary people dress up as women and take part in a beautiful lamp ceremony celebrating the Hindu goddess of Bhagavathy.
Parents dress up their sons, family members dress up the men of the family, and there are make-up artists and beauticians to help the rest.
Jaime (left photo) is a salon owner, stylist from
Elizabethton, TN. Carla is a software developer and small business owner. They both identify as male to female transsexual.
Growing up Carla was
trying to be the all American boy, enlisting in the Air Force being
discharged 18 months later when they found she had “gender
issues”. Before her transition, she was in what she describes as “a nine
year loveless marriage”. A suicide attempt
turned her life completely upside down.
“I met Jaime at a support group meeting in 1999. We both fell in love with
each other instantly, but kept it to ourselves for years,” Carla tells.
Jamie married her boyfriend, and Carla was heartbroken. But soon they expressed their feelings for one another:
“The term “soulmate” is an inadequate description of our
bond with one another,” Carla says.
In 2004 they bought a home together, and soon Carla’s daughter and son came to live with them. The children are now grown and on their own, and Jamie and Carla have one granddaughter and a grandson on the way.
The story of Jamie and Carla is part of the project Self Evident Truths, where photographer iO Tillett Wright has set out to photograph 10 000 people who identify as some kind of not straight. The project has published over 9 000 photos to date, from all 50 American states.
Sheth, who first appears in Jessica Jones in Season 1, tells Pink News that her choice of roles have been limited by being transgender.
“Being at the intersectionality of queer and South Asian has made me the target of a lot of discrimination. Professionally, there has not been a lot of opportunities available to someone like me.
That’s slowly changing now. Trans people of colour are real world, why shouldn’t they colour our film and TV worlds?”
Aneesh Sheth plays Gillian, Jessica Jones new assistant, in the third season of the Marvel series.
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